To our darling Valentines:
Years ago, Erma Bombeck wrote a little ditty to her three children, explaining why she loved each of them (oldest, middle and youngest) best. My mother kept that clipping in her wallet for years. I remember reading it and understanding that, while we kids might have thought there was a favorite, a parent’s love doesn’t favor one over the other, but favors the unique qualities in each child.
So, on Valentine’s Day, here is why we love each of you best, oldest to youngest. We’re starting with Rob, because anybody who’s stuck around this long is family, mixed blessing though it may be.
Rob – We love you best because you are the outgoing one. You are committed to being and making friends. We love your gift of making others feel important; in turn you are very much admired. Only a person who is self-accepting winds up with this coveted talent. We love that you are able to leave your unique mark in this way. We love that you have chosen to experience and embrace new places and changing ideas. We love how you know that to be interested is to be interesting.
Erin – We love you best because you are the adventurous one. You are determined to go where you need to go. We love that you concentrate on reaching new heights. Only a person who is disciplined will see herself through to obtaining the credential you are seeking. We love that you are unafraid to live in new places without ever having been to them. We love that you have chosen to keep learning. We love that you are unafraid to change your focus when you’re challenged.
Ben – We love you best because you are the thoughtful one. You have the heart and soul of a seeker. We love that you are interested in many things, and that you consider them thoughtfully. We love how you show up unexpectedly with something you thought would interest us, as well. Only a person who is reflective will achieve great empathy and understanding. We love that you are unafraid to go your own way. We love that you are kind and accepting, even as you decide your path.
Geoff – We love you best because you are the surprising one. You are strong and resolved. We love that you continue to accomplish and learn, despite predictions made by others. We love how you sidestep obstacles. Only a person who has had to devise ways of doing things differently will truly know what it means to reach each milestone. We love that you can sit with someone you don’t know for a little while, get to know them, and make a new friend. We love that you are blazing your trail.
Robin – We love you best because you are the persistent one. You are focused with the strength of will. We love how you can work magic with animals, and that they recognize they have a champion in you. We love how you are receptive and sensitive to feelings. Only a person who is comfortable in her own skin can celebrate who she is as well as who others are. We love that your intelligence manifests in perception and self-worth. We love that you are working on and realizing your lifelong dream.
Jessica – We love you best because you are the artistic one. You remind us that the big picture is composed of many parts that are interesting in and of themselves. Only a person who has a unique way of seeing can zero in and share pleasure in something others might overlook. We love that you are able to get us to see beauty and composition in such delightful ways. We love that your creativity lets us see who you are. We love that you are planning to learn more and refine your talent.
Happy Valentine’s Day to a Fabulous Bunch!
Love, love, love from your Dad (Pete) and Mom (Betsy)
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Erma was a great writer. Even as an elementary and junior high student I read her column every week. A wiser or more witty woman will never again be found (except for my honey).
Pete´s last blog post..A LOVE LETTER TO OUR CHILDREN ON VALENTINE’S DAY
🙂 thanks, love you guys too, happy [late] valentines
thanks for the lovely words. i think you are pretty much spot on with those. you also put a smile on robs face by including him.
Beautiful!
Happy Valentine’s Day. 🙂
Betsy,
The thing which I really appreciate about your letter in this case is the degree to which you have gone into specific detail about the reasons for your love of each child.
It is all too easy to say ‘I love you,’ but what you have done here puts a great deal of flesh behind those words.
Andrew´s last blog post..Three special bloggers
Wow. I don’t know what to say. I was in a semi bad mood. That really brightened my day. Thanks. I love you guys too.
How absolutely beautiful and touching!
And Erma Bombeck is one of my heroes.
Since I only have one child, she gets ALL those.
Hapy belated VD day, whoops that doesn’t come out so great when made into an acronym , does it?
Jannie Funster´s last blog post..Like a bord on a wire, 4
Lovely, very good read and full of love – just the way I like it 🙂
Patricia´s last blog post..Messy, Messy, Messy
Hi Betsy. I bet your heart was full when you wrote this! Your family connections sound so supportive and satisfying. You are all blessed.
Davina´s last blog post..The Morning Muse — Just Write
This is just beautiful! Even though I only have one kid, this has inspired me to write a post just for her. All of our children deserve to be told this on a daily basis. Thank you for opening my heart.
Jay Schryer´s last blog post..Wrong Trains, Airports, and Relationships
Hi Jessica – I am looking at your photograph of Lake Superior and knowing that it will be summer before we know it!
Hi Erin and Rob – I’m glad you two could see this and get a warm, fuzzy all the way over there! Stay warm! Warning: the ‘rents are planning to visit in the near future!
Hi Vered – Thank you! I knew you’d relate to this, after your recent post about wishing to stop time with your children.
Hi Andrew – Each of us needs to know why we are appreciated, don’t we? I knew back in the day that I would emulate Erma’s gift to her children some day. It’s powerful, isn’t it? Thank you.
Hi Ben – You don’t know how much you brighten our days! So we thought we’d tell you!
Hi Jannie – Happy VD to you, too! Especially in light of your Armani condom post – it sorta goes together! 🙂
Hi Patricia – Thanks, glad you enjoyed it.
Hi Davina – You’re right, my heart is full. We are blessed with great kids. That they love us in our imperfection is the cherry on our sundae!
Hi Jay – Welcome! I’m glad you liked this, and even better to emulate it with your own daughter. Thank you for coming by!
Hi Betsy – What a wonderful Valentine’s Day gift to your children. I did not know you had a Jessica. My daughter is also called Jessica.
Hi Cath – Jessica, Ben and Erin came with Pete 🙂 A family friend told me we took the easy way toward having a large family. I dunno about that.
Betsy,
Absolutely, Erma’s deliberate approach would no doubt have left a significantly greater and longer lasting impression than the old ‘I love you.’ (Not that saying ‘I love you’ is insignificant or not important)
Andrew´s last blog post..Thoughts for a nation in shock